Pedologues episode 1 (transcript)

Abraxas

(laughs)

Rookiee

(laughs) As Awpy.. as Appy says: I'm waffeling.

Abraxas

A bit of diversion there.

Rookiee

Okay, but y.. y.. do you follow everything that I just said right there?

Abraxas

I think they basically follow uh.. the the problem I have, the same.. same, maybe similar to uhm, uhm, people who have a problem in their childhood, trying to paint every relationship with the same brush, is uhm, is uhm, society taking, uh, one person who commits a horrendous crime, I.. I believe his name is James Duncan, who kidnapped those children in Idaho after murdering their family. Uh..

Rookiee

Yeah. N.. now for those..

Abraxas

And then trying to paint everybody who has sexual feelings for boys or girl with the same brush, uh it's like that computer uh, uhm.. thing you can do, I think in Excell where you use paintbrush, and you can paint everything with the same paintbrush over and over again. I.. that's not uh fair, that's not fair, uh, we are different. I am no more like James Duncan.

Rookiee

They're stereotyping us..

Abraxas

Right.

Rookiee

..because they see one person, and..

Abraxas

Then I'm like a cow... just doesn't work.

Rookiee

People eh uh ju.. I.. I.. uh.. Jeffrey Gold, that guy that runs uh, SQR, sho.. Sure Quality Radio, uhm.. it's a boylove radio station, he, and I.. I agree with him so much, is that, uhm, and I cannot remember what I was going (laughs)

Abraxas

(laughs)

Rookiee

We're gonna have to edit that part 'cause I forgot what I was gonna say, but..

Abraxas

Okay.

Rookiee

Uuuhmmmmm.. (sighs) God.. oh my God, okay. We're gonna have to..

Abraxas

Part of the problem with podcast, you should try and to talk and think at the same time.

Rookiee

Or any kind of [media?]..

Abraxas

And that's kind of very confusing, for anybody.

Rookiee

Yeah. Oh God.

Abraxas

(laughs)

Rookiee

I don't know some of those.. those talk show hosts do it. W.. uh.. I'm gonna have to.. I mean.. I'm.. I'm learning. We're gonna get practise. This is us practicing. We're.. we're mouthing off.

Abraxas

This is our first podcast, people, relax.

Rookiee

I remember Gallagher, that comedian. He once said, uh: a heavyweigt fight ain't always fighting. I 've actually stopped to think..

Abraxas

And actually one of m.. one of my problems is, I told.. I told this to a friend of mine, uh, a long time ago, uhm.. And I.. I'm a writer. Uhm, I'm not necessarily a public speaker, though. I do enjoy public speaking. But one of my problems is, I'm a good thinker, but I'm not quick on my feed. I would never make it on Jeopardy. I couldn't push that damn button fast enough, because I'm not that quick. And I like to.. one reason I like to write is I like to rewrite, and rewrite, and rewrite, and work those sentences down nitty gritty..

Rookiee

You can't do that while you're talking.

Abraxas

..you can't do that on a podcast, it just talking! And sometimes, believe me, what I will do, this is.. I.. I'll tell you what.. now what I'm going to do. I'm going to go home tonight, and I'm going to crawl into bed and before I fall in sleep I'm going to say: oh, I didn't word that right.

Rookiee

Yeah.

Abraxas

Oh, I could have changed this.

Rookiee

You're going to lis..

Abraxas

Oh, I could have said that better. Then I will go to sleep and I'll have dreams about this. I'll wake up in the morning, saying:..

Rookiee

(chuckles)..could have nightmares.

Abraxas

..you could have said that better! (laughs)

Rookiee

Right, well, that's.. that's the cool thing is, uh, we can, uh, talk longer, and..

Abraxas

Yay..

Rookiee

..have a better, yeah, yeah..

Abraxas

(laughs)

Rookiee

..we can mouth out more. (sighs) So.. (sighs) okay.

Abraxas

Now, we hope you're listening.

Rookiee

God, what did Jeff, Jeffrey, Jeffrey! Help me what I.. what did you say? And uh, you're probably laughing your head off right now. Okay, what were you talking about before I talked about Jeffrey?

Abraxas

Oh you wouldn't want me to rewind the tape here! (laughs)

Rookiee

Ho.. hold on, hold on. Okay, we're gonna cheat here. I'm gonna put this on pause, go back, and listen to it, and try to..

Abraxas

Okay, hold on.

Rookiee

..figure out exactly.. hold on, okay. Everyone hold on, folks.

• Short intermission music

Rookiee

Allright! We're back, uhm. My brain got put back into its... head. Or my head got..

Abraxas

(laughs)

Rookiee

..okay, maybe it didn't. Anyway. My point was.. is Jeffrey Gold said: people make mental associations with actions, uhm. He makes the point where uhm, he says: if people.. okay, if if you're a kind and gentle person, and you like to hug people, and you're smiling and and you're kind, and you like gardening, people are going to associate that people that garden are usually happy and friendly people. I think that one of the biggest problems is, right now, in society, when people see that a pedophile, this person who they found out is having sex with their kids, is a kind and gentle person that means no harm, their brain trips over itself and goes: huhhh?

Abraxas

(chuckles)

Rookiee

Oh, well they must have been deceiving. They must have.. they must have something up their sleeve, they must have lied about something.

Abraxas

Cognitive dissonance.

Rookiee

Eh well, okay. Is that what that means? Okay, I've never understood that word, okay. They make that mental association and all of a sudden, it's derailed. It's b.. they take a backtrack, and I think it.. that right there, that's a that's a uh, miscommunication, that's a misperception. And it's fed on culturally, and other people say, they.. they, uh.. they, uh firm it with those people, and then they say: well, don't you know he's a pedophile? He must be horrible! He must b.. he he must be, you know, he.. don't listen to him, don't trust him! Him or her. I keep on using the word him, because obviously I'm a him. (deepens voice) No, I'm just a really masculin woman. No, uhm.. you get what I'm saying, right?

Abraxas

I get what you say.

Rookiee

Here, you know what I'm saying. Do you agree?

Abraxas

Yeah. I think.. a.. as far as I understand what you're saying I agree, yes.

Rookiee

It's basically, if if a pedophile is nice to their kid, after they found out about these quote unquote horrible, vicious things like: oh, I don't know, uh, let's see here... sharing themself physically in a sexual manner with their kid. But they see them as a nice person, they see him as a member of the community, someone of the church, someone who who, uh, not our church, someone, you know, of of, you know, they they they donate to charity and everything, they they're a cub scout leader, they're a boy scout leader, they they they're a counselor, they have a degree in this and that and and, you know, they know kids. Oh, they must have been grooming then, and teaching them things, and..

Abraxas

I hate the word grooming by the way.

Rookiee

Yeah, grooming. Yeah, like if..

Abraxas

Used in that context.

Rookiee

Okay. In the word gr.. okay, le.. uh.. let's talk about that, the word grooming. I've always heard, and I've always understood that parents, and these are just general parents, not people who are sexual with their.. with their kids, just people that have kids, are supposed to, quote unquote mold their child into something great in society. They're supposed to change them, supposed to make 'em think certain ways and everything. Uhm, that's grooming. You're grooming your child to think that money is the most important thing in the world, or to get a college degree, otherwise you suck or this or that. A boylover is going to mold a child into thinking that sex is a good thing, that is a positive thing, that we should not be..

Abraxas

Well, it is a good thing. (laughs)

Rookiee

It i.. well that's the thing. That that all comes back down to truth or not. It depends on whether or not the person thinks it's a good or bad thing.

Abraxas

My mantra on the boards is, and everybody's read it over and over again, my mantra is: sex is good.

Rookiee

Right.

Abraxas

Repeat it with me people: sex is good. (chuckles)

Rookiee

I.. I.. I do remember that uh from I think it's uh, You're Not Alone? (laughs)

Abraxas

But uh.. one of the things I remember saying, I remember watching Newscast one time and they had this detective on the news talking about a fellow they had arrested for molesting several boys, and put that in quotation par.. marks. Uhm, and he.. what he said was was amazing to me. It just, just flabbergasted me. I'll try to quote it as best I can. He's looking at the camera with a straight face, and he says: this man bought toys and presents and other things for this child.

Rookiee

(makes dramatic sound)

Abraxas

And we just don't understand why!

Rookiee

Errr..

Abraxas

Then I went: what?! (laughs)

Rookiee

Well, why does anyone else buy something for their kid? Because first of all, they want it. It makes them happy. It makes them happy. You wanna do something good for someone that you care about.

Abraxas

Absolutely.

Rookiee

Any gift in life that.. a gift, as in the definition of something or anything, any action, any any material object whatever, that you give to another person without, without any expectation of compensation in return. In other words, you do it just because you love them.

Abraxas

And that's a good thing. But there are also, you gotta remember too that parents don't just, for example getting back to your analogy about parents, parents don't just buy things for their kids because they love them. Yes, they do that. But a lot of parents will buy things for kids with expectations. They put expectation upon the gift.

Rookiee

Mmm mmm.

Abraxas

You get the car on your 16th birthday if you have..

Rookiee

Good grades..

Abraxas

..a 3.6 better GPA.

Rookiee

Right, right.

Abraxas

If you refrain from uh..

Rookiee

As a reward for for for..

Abraxas

..from sex before marriage, you know..

Rookiee

Right.

Abraxas

..whatever the condition is that the parent puts on. So, don't try to say that boylovers and girllovers use conditions. A lot of people who love kids use conditions.

Rookiee

Well, you are trying to teach them morals. Anyone tries to teach a kid morals. It just depends on whether or not people see that moral as a good or bad thing.

Abraxas

Okay, I.. let me.. let me interrupt again, I'm sorry, but..

Rookiee

Uh huh.

Abraxas

.. I.. what my goal is, to teach a young person to think. One of the problems with their educational system is regurgitation. You will memorize that 1776 was the founding date of.. July 4 1776 was the founding date of the r.. in the.. of the revolution here in the United States. Or whatever date or whatever name, John Quincy Adams whatever. We don't teach our children to think. They don't..

Rookiee

Mmm mmm.

Abraxas

..take time to teach children to think.

Rookiee

Yeah.

Abraxas

I have always, always..

Rookiee

To think for theirselves..

Abraxas

Given..

Rookiee

..not to think what other people think.

Abraxas

Given my lovers the opportunity..

Rookiee

Yeah.

Abraxas

..to reason things out, and think things out for themselves. Let me give you an example. Okay, this is not one of my lovers, I'm not sexually involved with anybody. I've not been sexually involved with anybody for a very long..

Rookiee

Disclaimer for a you listening.

Abraxas

..time. Everybody can cry now and feel sorry for me, but, I'm not..

Rookiee

(sobby voice) Oóóhhhooohhoho, come heeere!

Abraxas

(chuckles) Yeah, poor me. (chuckles)

Rookiee

Here, let me pet you on the back, okay, there you going..

Abraxas

But, uh, this was an interesting case. I.. I had known this boy for a long time. And I told him about three years prior to this uhm event that uh I was a boylover and, and uhm, I was not..

Rookiee

And you told him what a boylover was.

Abraxas

..asking for anything, I was not asking for anything, I was not putting anything on him. There was no sexual relationship whatsoever, uhm..

Rookiee

What was your reasoning for telling him?

Abraxas

Because I wanted him to understand so that in case he found out from somebody else he wouldn't say to himself: oh, well the only reason he liked me is he wanted to get in my pants, which wasn't true. Actually, I like him, but I've never been sexually attracted to him..

Rookiee

Okay.

Abraxas

..so no I didn't want to get in his pants!

Rookiee

Okay. (laughs)

Abraxas

But that's on the side.

Rookiee

Okay, but..

Abraxas

I.. I did not want to get in his pants..

Rookiee

..but, okay.

Abraxas

..but that's on the side. But here's.. here's the thing. About three or four after I told him this, and we were fine all this time, you know. He still liked me and everything. We're sitting along together, and I.. I happen to mention to him that uh, society considers me dangerious and violent. And uh, he stopped what he was doing, and he looked at me very seriously and he said: you're violet?

Rookiee

(laughs)

Abraxas

And I said: excuse me, blank, place-name-here, I said excuse me, but uhm, how long have you known me? And he looked at me and he said: oh, yeah. And he went back..

Rookiee

Yeah.

Abraxas

..to what he was doing. Here's a kid who at that time was about 14 or 15 years of age, who knows how I feel about boys. He knows me, and here's.. I'm giving him society's viewpoint of me in general, of boylovers in general, and here he is at 14 or 15 years of age, who's able to look at me as a person, know that I have no sexual interest in him, and accept me, and take a look at society's evalution of me and say: you know what? Society is screwed. If they're [smart enough?]..

Rookiee

He saw you..

Abraxas

..to figure this out at 14 or 15, why the hell can't other people figure it out?

Rookiee

He saw you becau.. well, first of all, he, he had.. uh, you.. you and him have both established a relationship or as.. as..

Abraxas

A friendship.

Rookiee

..yeah, a friendschip..

Abraxas

So only a friendship, people. That's it.

Rookiee

As the media dubs: he befriended him. I hate the word befriended, because befriended means you're kinda like carjacking someone. You're taking them to.. to.. as a friend, whether or not they wanna a friend. No. (chuckles) Okay. So he saw you for what you are and not what other people say you're supposed to be.

Abraxas

Right.

Rookiee

I think.. I think another problem that we face today is, since society, since there are so many humans on this world, since the community, the community as in the human community, is so large... it's hard to become personal. It's hard to find out to know someone. I think that's why people latch on to movie stars and celebrities so much, is because since in this huuuge world people need to identify with someone and to say: that person is a good person. I like the way he acts, I like the way he thinks, and why people, you know, they try to get, you know, get into politics once they've become famous, is because even though they might now jack shit about a certain subject, people think that they're gonna know everything, because they know.. becau.. because people relate to them. They get.. they they interact w.. on on a.. I mean.. the.. okay, the the w.. Tom Cruise, whatever, millions of women love him! They chase after him, they wanna get..

Abraxas

And a few men.

Rookiee

..in bed with him.

Abraxas

(chuckles)

Rookiee

He's never met any of 'm! But they have established his his ego, you know, his.. it has come outward, and people have have fallen in love with this person without even meeting him. And I.. and that's that's a big problem in society I think is that.. it's.. and I think that's why on the internet most of communications such as podcasting and interactivity on a many-to-many level, but yet on a personal level, on an intimate level. When I'm meaning intimate, I talking about one-on-one, not uh.. not talking sexually, no. A lot of people like to use the word intimate as sexual. I don't think it is sexual, I think is.. one-on-one, you-and-me interaction, intimate. It has both of those and slowly, eh.. because that's human nature, just like Douglas Adams once said, you know. That's human nature. All of these technological terms that we have for all of this networking, pervasive networking and everything, they are so integrated in human nature that before the industrial revolution, before everything became impersonal, before things started, you know, exploding uhm, in size and population, we didn't even realise we had to have terms for these, you know. It was the way that people interacted naturally, and it's returning to that state thanks to the new technology called the internet. And, it's allowing people to communicate on an interpersonal level on a mass basis.

Abraxas

Okay [again?], since you mention..

Rookiee

Okay.

Abraxas

..internet, let me interrupt here for a minute and say a couple things before our time is up for this hour. Uhm, I'm I'm gonna wet your appetite. There are.. there are a lot of things, uh, that we need to talk about (cough) in these podcasts in the future. I'm just gonna wet your appetite a bit, and give you a hint of what some of them some of them, not all though..

Rookiee

Alright, go for it.

Abraxas

..might might be. Uhm..

Rookiee

You've got five minutes.

Abraxas

BL boards, good or bad? Are they positive? Are they account to allow people to hide? Are they, uh.. should we be getting out into the real world? Uhm, age of consent. Sex offender registries.

Rookiee

Mmm mmm.

Abraxas

Sex offenders in general. New laws who may or may not be coming out. Uhm, how we treat our lovers. What's the difference between a YF and a SYF? Uhm..

Rookiee

Terms..

Abraxas

All these.. all the terms, take.. you know.. all these things we need talking about a lot more. So, we will be bringing these subjects up, and we will voicing our opinions, some of which you may agree and some of which you may not agree with. Uhm, I have no problems with disagreement. Uhm, but we need to discuss these things, and we need to talk about these thing..

Rookiee

(laughs)

Abraxas

..we need to understand these things.

Rookiee

You have no problems with disagreement as long as they don't disagree, right?

Abraxas

Nooo, I didn't say that!

Rookiee

(laughs) Okay, I'm just k.. I'm playing with you.

Abraxas

As long as they disagree intelligently.

Rookiee

Okay, uh that.. I like that. I like that. Uhm, and also, I like to alsooo, uhm, have guests on, via skype once we get the technology..

Abraxas

Yeah, George Bush is gonna be on next week.

Rookiee

Yeah, yeah. Oh yeah, by the way..

Abraxas

(laughs)

Rookiee

..if any of you listening here, uh, any hatemail that you guys wanna send, just send it to this mail address: it's 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue..

Abraxas

(laughs)

Rookiee

uhm.. anyway.. okay..

Abraxas

..care of care of care of the prick who lives there.

Rookiee

Yeah, uhm..

Abraxas

(chuckles) Can I say that on a podcast? (laughs)

Rookiee

You can say anything.. you can say any fucking word you want, okay? This is..

Abraxas

Can you say fucking on a podcast?

Rookiee

You can say anything. There is no FCC involved here.

Abraxas

Fuck you, I cannot say fuck on a podcast.

Rookiee

Goddamnit!

Abraxas

(laughs)

Rookiee

I hate cursing Goddamnit! Uhm.. by the way, I think uh when people say taking the Lord's name in vain, I don't think it just means saying Goddamnit. I think it basically means taking his name for granted, which a lot of people do. And so therefor I can say Goddamnit with uh, a uh, unguilty conscience. Anyway, uh, I'd like to have uhm, sections on our podcast, maybe like ten, uh maybe five ten minutes on uh websites and [parading?] the website, and no we.. no we.. we.. first of all, no advertising on this, no contributions, no this or that. Word of mouth is the only thing that I want to have happened here. And that's.. that has been the tried and and true uh marketing succes for the internet. That's how..

Abraxas

Hey, he may not take contributions, but I'll take all moneys..

Rookiee

(laughs) Yeah, yeah..

Abraxas

..cor.. coiner.. quarter forwarding, I don't care. (laughs)

Rookiee

If anyone wants to send money to Abe, uhm.. send it to some imaginary place because we're not gonna give you our addresses, okay? Uhm.. but anyway, we're doing this out of our own pocket. We're doing it in seclusion, uh, away from the prying eyes of of uh these satellites that are currently flying over our heads, tracking our every movement and uh.. uhm.. and so that's about it. (chuckles) Uh, a couple a couple of plugs, obviously. Surequalityradio.org, uhm, is a boylove internet radio station as I said before, and if you think that uh this podcast is good, you g.. you should listen and tune in and don't complain about the music, just wait for the dj's, okay? Because the dj's are what's it all about. Every person that goes on there is doing it voluntarily, and they're doing because they believe in this, in this cause. And yes I do think there is a big cause and uh some people out there listening to this have no idea about the BL community, say: oh my God, there's this.. there's a movement to gain civil rights? Uh, yeah. In fact uh, I think..

Abraxas

Duh, yeah.

Rookiee

..everyone's known about NAMBLA, and we will be getting into..

Abraxas

(shocked voice) You mentioned the n-word!

Rookiee

.. yeah, well, be getting to them to uhm..

Abraxas

Yes, we will. Definitely will.

Rookiee

And we'll be getting into other organisation, uh, some old and some upcoming. And uh we'll be talking about, you know, what they stand for and uh, and the believes that they have. And, so that's what basically this is about. And.. uhm.. boywiki.org. Anyone who doesn't know about a wiki, is uh.. uh should type in wikipedia.org, that's w-i-k-i-p-e-d-i-a dot org. And it is a worldwide open encyclopedia that any person on the net, you don't have to log in, you can edit any page you want, and the quote unquote truth will come out. And so boywiki.org which just opened on the nineth actually, yesterday. I [wanted to?]..

Abraxas

And one more thing, we are doing this in the nude while eating [pomeranets?].

Rookiee

Yes. Uh, no. Wait a minute, no. Don't listen to him, okay. (laughs) Uhm.. boywiki.org, as Hasmal said in the chatroom, is basically, it's history and information documented. And if any changes are made to a page, that history is kept on an archive on that website, the old versions of it. So, if history, if something in the world changes, it's a living encyclopedia. The old version, quote unquote, the old version of the encyclopedia is archived for all time as long as the server doesn't go down and they keep an archive of it. Uhm, so, boywiki.org is dedicated to archiving the ki.. the history, the culture, and current events, and terms and everything to do about boylove, and its community. And uh, it's boywiki.org, and it's currently being hosted by uh, Freespirits. Uh, Freespirits is having a uh donation drive right now, and they are hosting a couple of special events. They're hosting a.. arts festival. Uh, I haven't taken a look into that yet. Uh, do you know anything about that? Y'know, the arts festival?

Abraxas

Uhm, I know it's a money raising.. uhm opportunity because uhm.. uh the uh.. the website needs uh.. money to keep going..

Rookiee

Right.

Abraxas

..and to keep their status.

Rookiee

Freespirits is a organisation dedicated to boylove history, support and chat, and different various websites, and there's a lot of people involved with it. Dylan Thomas, who is a.. also a dj on Sure Quality Radio, hosts boychat.org which is a website that Freespirits hosts. Boychat.org is the oldest, I believe uh, open webbased forum for posting messages..

Abraxas

That is true.

Rookiee

..about boylove.

Abraxas

That is true, it is the oldest.

Rookiee

And uh older than every other boylove board that's come and gone, uhm. And I do notice that there's a exponential growing amount of of BL boards, here and there, childlove board in general, which is a good thing, because uh, it's free speech, and that that that's that's the thing. Uhm, so they are currently having a donations drive. I uh.. that's not the proper word for it. But basically a fundraiser, because they host everything through their own machine, with their own money. And each month, I believe, it takes close to a thousand dollars to host these and maintain these these websites and the servers and the bandwidth, uhm, to keep all of this going. And it's done purely for the cause of boylove, and getting, uhm, and and keeping, you know, contact and and, basically, you know, maintaining the culture, online. Uhm, as Malcolm McLaren said: the battle for culture of the 21st century is gonna be online, it's not gonna be in a physical place. Thoughts and ideas, uhm, so that's what that's going on fo.. I don't know, how long is that, uh?

Abraxas

I'm not sure..

Rookiee

The, the drive?

Abraxas

..how many days.

Rookiee

Okay, I'll check on that uhm. But yeah, I'll put a link on the shownotes for that. I'll.. I.. I'm gonna be making shownotes for this, by the way. Abe, I'm going to..

Abraxas

Go to the board, they're posting several posts about it, you know..

Rookiee

Yeah.

Abraxas

[there's?].. all the information.

Rookiee

Well, I'm going to be..

Abraxas

On the board..

Rookiee

I'm gonna be putting links up to all of the sites and all of the different things we have talked about tonight. Uhm, but we haven't talked about many actual sites tonight, and basically just randomly spewing a bunch of them at the last minute because, you know, I want people to, you know.. this is the first podcast. People are gonna be hearing this one the first. And, so, I'm trying to get a lot of uh open information.. we'll.. we'll be going in more detail about each of these types of things later on uh and, in future shows. Uhm, but right now the uh current time that we have talked is uh one minu.. uh one minute, one hour and three minutes and after I make all the edits it probably be a little bit underneath an hour. Uhm, edits, because I.. I talk stupidly sometimes and can't get my words out correctly, so..

Abraxas

Not just you.

Rookiee

(sighs) Yeah, we'll get better at it, uh. And also probably the add-in, whatever's.. cool sound effects and uh, uh not sound effects.. I'm gonna make some intro music for this, or at least I plan to..

Abraxas

We are just two.. we are just two people who have ideas, and uh we've discussed them on several boards I'm sure..

Rookiee

Mm mm.

Abraxas

..and uh, we decided to get together and uh..

Rookiee

I'm sick..

Abraxas

..we ideas and opinions. They may not be always correct. I have been..

Rookiee

Oops.

Abraxas

..wrong a few times in my life, believe it or not.

Rookiee

I just wasn't.. yeah 'cause you you you introduced youself, but I didn't.. I didn't introduce myself, and I think I'll do it real quick. My name is Rookiee. Uhm, I've been an active, uhm, person in this community for close to ten years now. And uh, I found out about other boylovers from the net. So I owe a la.. I owe a lot to uh, whoever uh thought of making TCP/IP-stack protocol. (laughs) Uhm, yeah, all you geeks out there know what I'm talking about. Uhm, and uh I'm.. I made a realisation, uhm, just recently within the last month or so, is that because I'm a boylover, I'm probably, for the rest of my life, not going to be able to reach my full potential to live a full and happy life, because of what it is that I'm into and what it is that I believe in. And so, my intentions are to attempt to make the next generation a little more happy and a little more free, and uh try to erase some of the damage and teach people that we're not a bunch of bad guys, and..

Abraxas

Amen to that, brother.

Rookiee

And uh.. I'm pretty sure that everyone out there who hates us, is probably to this right now and saying: yeah, you're full of it. Uhm, I like to think that I'm a nice person. I am a very open minded person in more.. in more ways than than than just uh.. boylove. It took me a lot of self-discovery on a social level, uh psychological level, to first of all stop hating myself because up until the age of about 19 or 20, I did hate myself, I was a self-loathing, uh, pedosexual. I like that word myself, pedosexual, because it compares us to heterosexual and homosexual, versus phile, and we'll get into that later on. I know there's a huuuuge debate about uh semantics and, personally I don't care. I think Jeff is right. The other night, Jeff was uh, slightly drunk and he was on the air saying: it doesn't matter what we call ourselves, we're still being picked one by one and being put into jail. It doesn't fucking matter. Leave it alone, it doesn't matter what we call ourself, it doesn't matter what gender we like, it doesn't matter! We need to unite and start doing something. And so, that's what this podcast is. And that's what SQR is. And uh, a lot of people blame SQR for just preaching to the to the church. They do a lot of preaching to the church, and the church meaning, you know, other boylovers. But first of all, other boylovers need that support. And also the boards do this as well, and that's what Ab.. uh Abraxas was talking about. And I'm talking too much, I'm gonna stop now, because you're just looking at me over there. Okay okay, we're gonna stop now, okay. He's he's he's giving me a a cutting-off-head sign. Okay.

• Pedologues theme music fades in.

Rookiee

I'm gonna stop, okay. Uhm.. I'm done. I wasn't done, but I'm done. So..

Abraxas

Thank you for listening.

Rookiee

Thank you, and uh.. (deepens voice) see you next time, uhm, okay.. got it? How do you turn this thing off?

• Pedologues theme music takes over, end of show.